Interesting use of Bots

When you get a chance, add the following two MSN contacts to your contacts list in your MSN Messenger: encarta@conversagent.com bbcbackstage@hotmail.com The former is basically a bot that links to some of the Encarta knowledgebase and brings you back the answers. Quite a cool little tool if you want to get a quick answer to something and it will even point you in the direction of the Encarta website if it doesnt know the answer The latter is a link to the BBC tv listings. Start off by saying 'hello' and then just follow the prompts to get back the information you need. These are two excellent examples of IM bots and I think it would be great to see more of these in years to come things like directory enquiries, train operators (to see when the next train is coming leaving for Reading for example), NHS (to suppliment the NHS Direct phone service) and cinemas for film listings to name but a few. Source: http://blogs.technet.com/rtcnews/archive/2005/11/29/415295.aspx

Siddhuism

A few of Siddhuism for all you cricketing and non-cricketing fans :- Statistics are like bikinis… what they reveal is suggestive, what they hide is essential! Spit on your hands! Take the black flag! And start slitting throats! Wickets are like wives… you never know which way they will turn! He looks like a brooding hen over a China egg! It is very difficult to kill a man who is hell bent on committing suicide! He is as innocent as a freshly laid egg! When you are dining with the demons, you’ve got to have a long spoon! If ‘ifs and buts’ were ‘pots and pants’ there would be no tinkers! The ball went so high it could have got an airhostess on its way down! This team is like bicycles in a cycle stand… one falls and the entire row falls! The scoreboard is running faster than an Indian Taximeter! The batsman is like a three-wheeler. Sucks a lot of fuel, but cannot go beyond 30! The wily fox is back… it is an ill omen when a fox licks the lambs! A big outcry but no outcome! All that comes from a cow is not milk! Just because a rose smells sweet, you do not use it in the soup!

Laws of the life

LAWS OF LIFE ........ Lorenz's Law of Mechanical Repair After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch. Anthony's Law of the Workshop: Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner. Kovac's Conundrum: When you dial a wrong number, you never get an engaged tone. Cannon's Karmic Law: If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the next morning you will have a flat tire. O'brien's Variation Law: If you change queues, the one you have left will start to move faster than the one you are in now. Bell 's Theorem: When the body is immersed in water, the telephone rings. Ruby's Principle Of Close Encounters: The probability of meeting someone you know increases when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with. Willoughby 's Law: When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will. Zadra's Law Of Biomechanics: The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach. Breda 's Rule: At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle arrive last. Owen's Law: As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.

You have 2 Cows

To help lighten your winter blahs, herewith a glossary which attempts to explain the proliferating and confusing list of "ism"s which have evolved over the past century. SOCIALISM: You have 2 cows and you give one to your neighbor. COMMUNISM: You have 2 cows; the Government takes both and gives you some milk. FASCISM: You have 2 cows; the Government takes both and sells you some milk. NAZISM: You have 2 cows. The Government takes both and shoots you. BUREAUCRACY: You have 2 cows; the Government takes both, shoots one, milks the other and throws the milk away... TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM: You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull. Your have multiplies, and the economy grows. You sell them and retire on the income. AN AMERICAN CORPORATION: You have two cows. You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows. Later, you hire a consultant to analyze why the cow dropped dead. A FRENCH CORPORATION: You have two cows. You go on strike because you want three cows. A JAPANESE CORPORATION: You have two cows. You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk. You then create a clever cow cartoon image called Cowkimon and market them World-Wide. A GERMAN CORPORATION: You have two cows. You reengineer them so they live for 100 years, eat once a month, and milk themselves. AN ITALIAN CORPORATION: You have two cows, but you don't know where they are. You break for lunch. A RUSSIAN CORPORATION: You have two cows. You count them and learn you have five cows. You count them again and learn you have 42 cows. You count them again and learn you have 2 cows. You stop counting cows and open another bottle of vodka. A SWISS CORPORATION: You have 5000 cows, none of which belong to you. You charge others for storing them. A CHINESE CORPORATION: You have two cows. You have 300 people milking them. You claim full employment, high bovine productivity, and arrest the newsman who reported the numbers. AN INDIAN CORPORATION: You have two cows. You worship them. BRITISH CORPORATION: You have two cows. Both are mad. AN EGYPTIAN CORPORATION: You have two cows. Both are voting for Mubarak!

Bathroom Rules for Men !

Click here to see bathroom rules for men !

Signs of a Stroke

During a BBQ a friend stumbled and took a little fall - she assured everyone that she was fine (they offered to call paramedics) and just tripped over a brick because of her new shoes. They got her cleaned up and got her a new plate of food - while she appeared a bit shaken up, Ingrid went about enjoying herself the rest of the evening. Ingrid's husband called later telling everyone that his wife had been taken to the hospital - (at 6:00pm, Ingrid passed away.) She had suffered a stroke at the BBQ - had they known how to identify the signs of a stroke perhaps Ingrid would be with us today. It only takes a minute to read this- Recognizing a Stroke A neurologist says that if he can get to a stroke victim within 3 hours he can totally reverse the effects of a sroke...totally..He said the trick was getting a stroke recognized, diagnosed an`getting to the patient within 3 hours which is tough. RECOGNIZING A STROKE Thank goodness for the sense to remember the "3" steps. Read and Learn! Sometimes symptoms of a stroke are difficult to identify. Unfortunately, the lack of awareness spells disaster. The stroke victim may suffer brain damage when people nearby fail to recognize the symptoms of a stroke. Now doctors say a bystander can recognize a stroke by asking three simple questions: 1. *Ask the individual to SMILE. 2. *Ask him or her to RAISE BOTH ARMS. 3. *Ask the person to SPEAK A SIMPLE SENTENCE (Coherently) (i.e. It is sunny out today) If he or she has trouble with any of these tasks, call 9-1-1 mmediately and describe the symptoms to the dispatcher. After discovering that a group of non-medical volunteers could identify facial weakness, arm weakness and speech problems, researchers urged the general public to learn the three questions. They presented their conclusions at the American Stroke Association's annual meeting last February. Widespread use of this test could result in prompt diagnosis and treatment of the stroke and prevent brain damage. A cardiologist says if everyone who gets this e-mail sends it to 10 people; you can bet that at least one life will be saved. BE A FRIEND AND SHARE THIS ARTICLE WITH AS MANY FRIENDS AS POSSIBLE, you could save their lives.

Intersting Quotes about Wife !

My wife dresses to kill. She also cooks the same way. -Henny Youngman ---------------------------------------------------------- My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met. -Rodney Dangerfield ----------------------------------------------------------- A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong. -Milton Berle ------------------------------------------------------------ I bought my wife a new car. She called and said, "There was water in the carburetor." I asked her, "Where's the car?" She replied, In the lake." -Henny Youngman ----------------------------------------------------------- The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret. -Henny Youngman ----------------------------------------------------------- After a quarrel, a wife said to her husband, "You know, I was a fool when I married you." The husband replied, "Yes, dear, but I was in love and didn't notice." ------------------------------------------------------------- When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her. -------------------------------------------------------------- I haven't spoken to my wife in 18 months - I don't like to interrupt her. ---------------------------------------------------------- My girlfriend told me I should be more affectionate. So I got myself two girlfriends. --------------------------------------------------------- A man said his credit card was stolen but he decided not to report it since the thief was spending much less than his wife did. ------------------------------------------------------- Man is incomplete until he is married. Then he is finished. --------------------------------------------------------- A little boy asked his father, "Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?" The father replied, "I don't know son, I'm still paying." --------------------------------------------------------- Young Son: Is it true, Dad, that in some parts of Africa, a Man doesn't know his wife until he marries her? Dad: That happens in every country, son. --------------------------------------------------------- Then there was a man who said, "I never knew what real happiness was until I got married; then it was too late. --------------------------------------------------------- A man placed an ad in the classifieds: "Wife wanted." The next day he received a hundred letters. They all said the same: "You can have mine." -------------------------------------------------------- A woman was telling her friend, "I made my husband a millionaire." "And what was he before you married him?" asked the friend. "A billionaire." she replied, --------------------------------------------------------- Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence. Second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience. ----------------------------------------------------------- It's not true that married men live longer than single men. It only seems longer. ---------------------------------------------------------- Losing a wife can be very hard. In my case, it was almost impossible. ------------------------------------------------------ Just think, if it weren't for marriage, men would go through life thinking they had no faults at all. ------------------------------------------------------- A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man. ---------------------------------------------------------- A man meets a genie. The genie tells him he can ask for whatever he wants, but his mother-in-law gets double of what he gets. The man thinks for a moment and says, Okay, give me a million dollars and beat me till I'm half dead." --------------------------------------------------------- Men who have pierced ears are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced pain and bought jewelry. ---------------------------------------------------------- The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once.

Proud Indian

Hope you feel as proud as I did when I read this: One of my friends in India wrote this mail and sent to many including me. Please read. Dear Friends, Here is a personal experience, as well as a moment of national pride, which I want to share with you. Hope you find it worth the time you put in reading it : "In the middle of 1965 India-Pakistan war, US govt - then a close friend of Pakistan - threatened India with stopping food-aid (remember "PL-480"?). For a food deficient India this threat was serious and humiliating. So much so that in the middle of war, Prime Minister (Late) Lal Bahadur Shastri went to Ram Leela Grounds in Delhi and appealed to each Indian to observe one-meal-fast every week to answer the American threat. As a school boy, I joined those millions who responded to Shastri ji's call. I continued the fast even when the war was over and India became self sufficient in food. Hurt deep by the national humiliation suffered at the hands of the US govt, I had vowed to stop my weekly fast only when India starts giving aid to USA. It took just 40 years. Last week THE day arrived. When Indian ambassador in Washington DC handed over a cheque of US$ 50 million to the US govt, two plane loads of food, medical aid and other relief materials were waiting to fly to the USA. Time to break the fast? With no bad feeling about the USA, and good wishes for the Katrina victims, this humble Indian feels proud of the distance India has covered in 40 years. Let's celebrate a New India!"

Wife

A man walking along a California beach was deep in prayer. Suddenly the sky clouded above his head and, in a booming voice, the Lord said, "Because you have TRIED to be faithful to me in all ways, I will grant you one wish." The man said, "Build a bridge to Hawaii so I can drive over anytime I want." The Lord said, "Your request is very materialistic. Think of the enormous challenges for that kind of undertaking. The supports required to reach the bottom of the Pacific! The concrete and steel it would take! It will nearly exhaust several natural resources. I can do it, but it is hard for me to justify your desire for worldly things. Take a little more time and think of something that would honor and glorify me." The man thought about it for a long time. Finally he said, "Lord, I wish that I could understand my wife. I want to know how she feels inside, what she's thinking when she gives me the silent treatment, why she cries, what she means when she says 'nothing's wrong,' and how I can make a woman truly happy." The Lord replied, "You want two lanes or four on that bridge???"

Classic Loveletter

You need to know the Indian Ads to understand this loveletter: My dear FAIR and LOVELY (ek chand ka tukda), you are my TVS SCOOTY (first love) and my AIWA (pure passion). I always BPL (believe in the best) and you know that iam a Knowledge Infotech guy your right sourcing partner . you are SANSUI (better than the best). You are DOMINO'S PIZZA (delivering a million smiles) for me. This is a COLGATE ENERGY GEL (seriously fresh) feeling for me. I want you to be my life pa! rtner but I think you are worried about your father who is KAWASAKI BAJAJ CALIBER (the unshakable) and my father who is CEAT (born tough), but don't worry as I am also FORD ICON (The josh machine) and rest of our family members are pretty KELVINATORS (the coolest ones). If our fathers say no, we will be WIPRO (applying thoughts), we will run away and marry, and PHILIPS (let's make things better). They will feel MIRINDA (zor ka jhatka dhire se lage) but I believe in COCA-COLA (jo chahe ho jaye). Trust in God who's always NOKIA (connecting people) who love each other. And do not forget that we are WILLS (made for each other). Now that HYUNDAI (we are listening) the song of love, you must know that love is DAIRY MILK (real taste of life), SATYAM ONLINE (fun fast easy) and PARX (always comfortable). So never forget me. Ok bye! I wrote little but actually PEPSI (yeh dil mange more)!!. Yours LG (digitally yours).

Why did Newton committed suicide?

Why did Newton committed suicide? Here is the reason. Once, Newton came to India and watched a few Tamil movies that had his head spinning. He was convinced that all his logic and laws in physics were just a huge pile of junk and apologized for everything he had done. In the movie of Rajanikanth, Newton was confused to such an extent that he went paranoid. Here are a few scenes 1) Rajanikanth has a Brain Tumor which, according to the doctors can't be cured and his death is imminent. In one of the fights, our great Rajanikanth is shot in the head. To everybody's surprise, the bullet passes through his ears taking away the tumor along with it and he is cured! Long Live Rajanikanth! 2) In another movie, Rajanikanth is confronted with 3 gangsters. Rajanikanth has a gun but unfortunately only one bullet and a knife. Guess, what he does? He throws the knife at the middle gangster? & shoots the bullet towards the knife. The knife cuts the bullet into 2 pieces, which kills both the gangsters on each side of the middle gangster & the knife kills the middle one. 3) Rajanikanth is chased by a gangster. Rajanikanth has a revolver but no bullets in it. Guess, what he does. Nah? not even in your remotest imaginations. He waits for the gangster to shoot. As soon as the gangster shoots,Rajanikanth opens the bullet compartment of his revolver and catches the bullet. Then, he closes the bullet compartment and fires his gun.Bang... the gangster dies... This was too much for our Newton to take! He was completely shaken and decided to go back. But he happened to see another movie for one last time, and thought that at least one movie would follow his theory of physics. The whole movie goes fine and Newton is happy that all in the world hasn't changed. Oops, not so fast! The 'climax' finally arrives. Rajanikanth gets to know that the villain is on the other side of a very high wall. So high that Rajanikanth can't jump even if he tries like one of those superman techniques that our heroes normally use. Rajanikanth has to desperately kill the villain because it's the climax. (Newton dada is smiling since it is virtually impossible?) Rajanikanth suddenly pulls two guns from his pockets. He throws one gun in the air and when the gun has reached above the height of the wall, he uses the second gun and shoots at the trigger of the first gun in air. The first gun fires off and the villain is dead. Newton commits suicide...

Still Miss this place !!!

P1000614.JPG, originally uploaded by kerim.

I still miss Rasranjan sweets and its food court :(

You know you're living in 2005 when...

You know you're living in 2005 when... 1. You accidentally enter your password on the microwave. 2. You haven't played solitaire with real cards in years. 3. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of 3. 4. You e-mail the person who works at the desk next to you. 5. Your reason for not staying in touch with friends and family is that they don't have e-mail addresses. 6. You go home after a long day at work you still answer the phone in a business manner. 7. You make phone calls from home, you accidentally dial "9" to get an outside line. 8. You've sat at the same desk for four years and worked for three different companies. 10. You learn about your redundancy on the 11 o'clock news. 11. Your boss doesn't have the ability to do your job. 12. You pull up in your own driveway and use your cell phone to see if anyone is home. 13. Every commercial on television has a website at the bottom of the screen. 14. Leaving the house without your cell phone, which you didn't have the first 20 or 30 (or 60) years of your life, is now a cause for panic and you turn around to go and get it. 15. You get up in the morning and go online before getting your coffee. 16. You start tilting your head sideways to smile. :-) 17. You're reading this and nodding and laughing. 18. Even worse, you know exactly to whom you are going to forward this message. 19. You are too busy to notice there was no #9 on this list. 20. You actually scrolled back up to check that there wasn't a #9 on this list. AND NOW U R LAUGHING at yourself. Go on, forward this to your friends ...you know you want to... I did! From one of the emails, I received.

How does Stock Markets Work?

The Red Indians on the remote reservation asked their New Chief if the winter was going to be cold or mild. Being a Red Indian chief in a modern society, he couldn't predict. Nevertheless, to be on the safe side, he replied to his Tribe that the winter was indeed going to be cold and that the members Of the village should collect wood to be prepared. But also being a practical leader, he called the National Weather Service and asked "Is the coming winter going to be cold?" "It looks like this winter is Going to be quite cold indeed," the meteorologist at the weather service Responded. So the Chief went back to his people and told them to collect even more Wood. A week later, he called the National Weather Service again. "Is it Going to be a very cold winter?""Yes," the man at National Weather Service again replied, "It's definitely going to be a very cold winter." The Chief again went back to his people and ordered them to collect Every scrap of wood they could find. Two weeks later, he called the National Weather Service again. "Are you Absolutely sure that the winter is going to be very cold?" "Absolutely," The Man replied. "It's going to be one of the coldest winters ever." "How can you be so sure?" the Chief asked. The weatherman replied, "The Red Indians are collecting wood like Crazy."

Bill Gates in Hell

Bill Gates died and found himself in Purgatory being sized up by God. "Well, Bill," God said, "I’m really confused about this call; I’m not sure whether to send you to Heaven or Hell. After all, you helped society by putting a computer in almost every home in the world, and yet you created that ghastly Windows 95. So I’m going to do something I’ve never done before. In your case, I’m going to let you decide where you want to go!" Bill replied, "Well, thanks, God. What’s the difference between the two?" God said, "I’m willing to let you visit both places briefly if it will help you make a decision." "Fine, but where should I go first?" God said, "I’m going to leave that up to you." Bill said, "Okay, then, let’s try Hell first." So off Bill went to Hell. It was a beautiful, clean, sandy beach with clear waters. There were thousands of beautiful women running around, playing in the water, laughing and frolicking about. The sun was shining, the temperature was perfect. Bill was very pleased. "This is great!" he told God. "If this is Hell, I REALLY want to see Heaven!" "Fine," said God and off they went. Heaven was a high place in the clouds, with angels drifting about playing harps and singing. It was nice, but not as enticing as Hell. Bill thought for a quick minute and rendered his decision. "Hmm, I think I prefer Hell," he told God. "Fine," God replied, "as you desire." So Bill Gates went to Hell. Two weeks later, God decided to check up on the late billionaire to see how he was doing in Hell. When God arrived in Hell, he found Bill shackled to a wall, screaming among the hot flames in a dark cave. He was being burned and tortured by demons. "How’s everything going, Bill?" God asked. Bill responded (his voice full of anguish and disappointment), "This is awful; this is not what I expected. I can’t believe this happened. What happened to that other place with the beaches and the beautiful women playing in the water?" "Ah," God smiled and said, "That was just the screensaver."

Interesting facts of men !

1. The nice men are ugly. 2. The handsome men are not nice. 3. The handsome and nice men are gay. 4. The handsome, nice and heterosexual men are married. 5. The men who are not so handsome, but are nice men, have no money. 6. The men who are not so handsome, but are nice men with money think we are only after their money. 7. The handsome men without money are after our money. 8. The handsome men, who are not so nice and somewhat heterosexual, don't think we are beautiful enough. 9. The men who think we are beautiful, that are heterosexual, somewhat nice and have money, are cowards. 10.The men who are somewhat handsome, somewhat nice and have some money and thank God that they are heterosexual, are shy and NEVER MAKE THE FIRST MOVE!!!! 11. The men who never make the first move, automatically lose interest in us when we take the initiative.

Pakistani Maths Question Paper ...

Pakistani Maths Question Paper ... Instructions i) Students found copying will be shot on the spot. ii) Any student coming late after 10 minutes after the exam starts will be forced to join Al Qayda Group . iii) Ak 47 -s and Grenades are not allowed in the exam hall. iv)Students may keep their daggers,Revolvers and pack of anthrax bombs only for self defense. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Math Exam Time 3 hours Full Marks 100 All questions are compulsory. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 1. Abdul was sent to jail for murder .He has 7 wifes in his house. Abdul distributed money to his wives in such a proportion that the youngest and most recent wife receives maximum and oldest wife gets minimum, and each wife gets double of her former competitor. Abdul Has 1700 Rupaye left in his house. Abdul's oldest wife needs atleast 25 rupaye per month. Find out the time when Abdul will have to break Jail to come out and earn money so that his wives do not starve. 2. Karim is a Drug seller. Prices per gram of Marijhuana, hasis, haroine and LSD s are 50,60,70,80 Rupaye respectively. Karim offers a discount of Rupaye 20 for his buyers who buys more than 50 grams of drug. If Rahim , a buyer gets Rupaye 37 discount , find out the grams of LSD he bought. 3. Imran tampers the ball thrice per over. He deforms the ball .02% of its original shape each time . Find the percentage deformation the ball due to tampering in a one day series against India in which Imran bowled 9.3 overs. 4. Mohammed has a Company named Al Allah Kidnapping & Murder Private Limited.He has to threaten 10 people per day over the Telephone. 40% of the people he threatens are cinema stars in Mumbai, 30% are Businessmen in Delhi, 20% are Cricket Players in Madras and 10% are shopkeepers in Calcutta . If ISD charges are rupaye 15, 25,40, 50 per minute from Mohammed's city Islamabad to Bombay, Delhi, Calcutta and Madras respectively and he gets a Telephone bill of 10,230 Rupaya in a month Find out The No of Cinema stars in Mumbai , threatened in that particular month. 5. A terrorist group has to provide one Ak47.one AK 49,one Rocket Launcher, 50 Grenades and one pack of RDX to its Ron roots for training .One AK 47 costs 100$; One Ak 49 costs 150 $ ,A Bazuka rocket Launcher costs 250 $ , grenade is 3 $ each , a pack of Rdx Bomb attached with remote Control is 500 $. The terrorist group admits 2000 new people every year out of which 30 % are court-martialed . Find the amt of Foreign Money Pakistan Govt has to provide each year to run such a group. 6. If stabilty of democratic Govt. in pakistan is given by the following equation X exp3 +X exp2-16 = i ; Find out x. 7. Probaliblity of a Pakistani prime minister to be shot is 78 %. Probabilty of a Military general to be shot is 80 %. Find the joint probability of a Prime minister to be shot who is also a Military general. 8.Find out geometrically the area of Paktunistaan using PI Theorem with Osama BIn Ladens correction ( That is taking the value of PI = 786 instead of 3.14....), if Paktunistaan is taken as a heptagon. Recieved in an email...

Side effects of alcohol ... and remedies!!!

1. Symptom: Cold and humid feet. Cause: Glass is being held at incorrect angle (You are pouring the drink on your feet). Cure: Maneuver glass until open end is facing upward 2. Symptom: The wall facing you is full of lights. Cause: You're lying on the floor. Cure: Position your body at a 90-degree angle to the floor. 3. Symptom: The floor looks blurry. Cause: You're looking through an empty glass. Cure: Quickly refill with your favorite beverage. 4. Symptom: The floor is moving. Cause: You're being dragged away. Cure: At least ask where they're taking you. 5. Symptom: You hear echoes every time someone speaks. Cause: You have your glass on your ear. Cure: Stop making a fool of yourself! 6. Symptom: The room is shaking a lot, everyone is dressed in white and the music is very repetitive. Cause: You're in an ambulance. Cure: Don't move. Let the professionals do their job. 7. Symptom: Your dad and all your brothers are looking at you funny. Cause: You're in the wrong house. Cure: Ask if they can point you to your house.

Women V/S Men

Woman 1: Oh! You got a haircut! That's so cute! Woman 2: Do you think so? I wasn't sure when she gave me the mirror. I mean, you don't think it's too fluffy looking? Woman 1: No, it's perfect. I'd love to get my hair cut like that, but I think my face is too wide. I'm pretty much stuck with this stuff I think. Woman 2: Are you serious? I think your face is adorable. And you could easily get one of those layer cuts - that would look so cute I think. I was actually going to do that except that I was afraid it would accent my long neck. Woman 1: Oh - that's funny! I would love to have your neck! Anything to take attention away from these football player shoulders of mine. Woman 2: Are you kidding? I know girls that would love to have your shoulders. Everything drapes so well on you. I mean, look at my arms, see how short they are? If I had your shoulders I could get clothes to fit me so much easier. ..................... NOW TWO MEN TALKING =================== Man 1: Haircut? Man 2: Yeah.

Water or Pepsi !

Which one is the 'Real Thing' ??? We all know that water is important but you've never seen it written down like this before. WATER 1) 75% of Americans are chronically dehydrated. (Likely applies to half world population.) 2) In 37% of Americans, the thirst mechanism is so weak that it is often mistaken for hunger. 3) Even MILD dehydration will slow down one's metabolism as much as 3%. 4) One glass of water will shut down midnight hunger pangs for almost 100% of the dieters studied in a University of Washington study. 5) Lack of water, the #1 trigger of daytime fatigue. 6) Preliminary research indicates that 8-10 glasses of water a day could significantly ease back and joint pain for up to 80% of sufferers. 7) A mere 2% drop in body water can trigger fuzzy short-term memory, trouble with basic math, and difficulty focusing on the computer screen or on a printed page. 8) Drinking 5 glasses of water daily decreases the risk of colon cancer by 45%, plus it can slash the risk of breast cancer by 79%, and one is 50%less likely to develop bladder cancer. Are you drinking the amount of water you should every day? PEPSI 1) In many states (in the USA) the highway patrol carries two gallons of Pepsi or Coke in the trunk to remove blood from the highway after a car accident. 2) You can put a T-bone steak in a bowl of Pepsi and it will be gone in two days. 3) To clean a toilet: Pour a can of Pepsi into the toilet bowl and let the "real thing" sit for one hour, then flush clean. The citric acid in Pepsi removes stains from vitreous china. 4) To remove rust spots from chrome car bumpers: Rub the bumper with a rumpled-up piece of Reynolds Wrap aluminum foil dipped in Pepsi. 5) To clean corrosion from car battery terminals: Pour a can of Pepsi over the terminals to bubble away the corrosion. 6) To loosen a rusted bolt: Applying a cloth soaked in Coca-Cola or Pepsi to the rusted bolt for several minutes. FOR YOUR INFORMATION: 1) The active ingredient in Pepsi is phosphoric acid. Its pH is 2.8. It will dissolve a nail in about four days. Phosphoric acid also leaches calcium from bones and is a major contributor to the rising increase in osteoporosis. 2) To carry Pepsi (the concentrate) the commercial truck must use the Hazardous Material place cards reserved for highly corrosive materials. 3) The distributors of Pepsi have been using it to clean the engines of their trucks for about 20 years! Now the question is would YOU like a glass of water or Pepsi?